Decluttering Your Mind of Health Fears

Last week I began what I am referring to as The Tour of Doctors 2014. The last couple of years I’ve been consumed with my back and the  rest of me sort of got neglected. Part of The Simple Year for me is focusing on my health, because that is and should be a priority.

Not only am I still consumed with my back, but we had to work through a medical issue for the Girl and a celiac disease diagnosis for Stephen. I felt like we were finally sort of maybe catching a break in the Fall for non-back related issues. And then my friend Kara passed away from an aggressive form of cancer 4 weeks after her diagnosis, leaving us all stunned beyond measure. The result of that was overwhelming shock and grief, as well as lots of questions from the kids about cancer: cancer detection, prevention and treatment. The Girl begged me, after one of those conversations, to go get the mammogram I was overdue for. So, last week I did, as well as taking care of the annual visit with my OBGYN.

The mammogram was not fun. I’m not sure which hurt more: the girls or my back. They both hurt like hell. Regardless, though, I couldn’t get beyond the fact that the last time I visited that side of the hospital, I was going to see Kara. Her death still haunts me. I miss her and my heart continues to ache for her husband and kids.

But I felt her presence during my visit. For real. Right around the time I had my right boob in my right hand while the left boob was being smashed like a pancake, with my left arm rotated outward while I was simultaneously “sticking my booty out” as instructed, leaning into the glass and pain daggers were shooting down my back. In that moment she was there. Because, Kara.
I got the results from my mammogram this weekend and I was given the all clear. For that, I am grateful. I know Kara is cheering from above. I still have a couple more non-back related appointments to make (dermatologist for a skin cancer screening and my regular doctor for an annual physical). It feels good to check those off of the to-do list, but more than that, I’m grateful for good news. Like those doubts that are always there, just below the surface, aren’t anymore. It’s sort of like decluttering those concerns that take up space in the back of your mind.
You may not have a daughter who begs you to get your mammogram and health check up. You may not have lost a friend from cancer. But, please go get checked out. Free your mind of the unknown. And cherish every single day you have, even if it’s a crappy one.
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